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my team leader dropped another hint and said that pretty much all of may was out of bounds for holiday as well. fuck, fuck, fuck!!. i really need a break. the irony is that it will help me work better and i know i will be more productive after a break. i better get a fucking renewal in april because i am going to be pissed if i did not get a good deal on a holiday to tokyo and then it transpires that they change their mind and i dont get renewed at the end of april. 

the irony is that everything else is going well at work. i am picking up some good knowledge and the people are nice. they just will not let me take a break. its been nearly 8 months with out a break and it looks like they want it to be at least 10 months before they even consider letting me take a few days off. 

have missed a few mid week gym sessions over the last few weeks. the weather has been awful and sometimes the trains are screwed and by the time you get home late in the pouring rain, the last thing you want to do is go straight back out to the gym. once the days get longer and milder and we move towards summer i will ramp up my training once again. shit, its not like i am going to be anywhere near a beach any time soon so its not as if anyone is going to see i dont have any good conditioning. 

this is the only thing i have look forward to in a few months.