today some guy in a suit gets on the train and was standing right near me. after about 10 minutes i could smell something strange in the air and then like 10 seconds later the full force of it hit. This dude did the worst fart you have ever had the displeasure to smell. It was so bad i am sure some people might have mistaken it for a terrorist attack using a chemical weapon or poison gas. Had the train not stopped at a station and opened its doors a minute later, i think i may have reached for the emergency alarm in the carriage, it was that bad.
So the smell dissipates, the doors close and the train carries on, and then guess what?. He drops another one and its just as bad as the first one. Dude!, what did you have breakfast?, a large bucket of baked beans, branflakes, a kebab, some extra hot chilli burritos and all of it washed down with 4 pints of cider and a 2 litre bottle of coke???.
That fella was dropping bombs on the train today. I know its not something you can directly control, but that is just wrong to almost suffocate a carriage full of people. I could have sworn i saw one guy turn to the person next to him and say “ tell my wife i love her.......i don’t think i am going to make it”. Other people were frantically writing wills on newspapers whilst some of the other passengers figured that paper might be destroyed by this putrid smell, started scratching messages to loved ones on the glass windows of the carriage using their keys.
i suspect the scene was reminiscent of the titanic and the minutes of panic after hitting the iceberg and the ship going down slowly, although in this case the soundtrack wasn’t crappy celine dion, but incubus – pardon me from the album, make yourself, which was playing on my headphones at the time.
as i struggled for oxygen i saw the images of loved ones before my eyes and my life flashed before me, i saw my mum dropping me off on my first day of school, i saw myself playing football in the summer with the kids i grew up with, i saw heartbreaks and kisses, i remembered bits of holidays i had been on, random concerts i had been to and sitting around joking and laughing with my friends.
oh lord don't take me now. i am too young and have so much more life to live. as the seconds ticked by i could feel my body getting cold and i could see a bright light in the distance slowly coming towards me. this must be it i thought. this must be the end coming towards me............and then the train stopped at the next station the doors opened and this person, this walking weapon of mass destruction, disembarked and probably went to his respectable job in the city completely unaware of the devastation left in his wake and to possibly terrorise another carriage of people on his journey home.
apart from my near-death experience this morning :-) its been a quiet friday. work has been dull. i'll be honest in that i haven't done that much study at work today and thats probably why its been dull today. the last month hasn't felt that bad at work but it was because i was keeping myself occupied with exams. today has given me a glimpse of what my job is really like. at this moment i would say there is a greater than 50% chance i will not renew my contract if i get offered an extension in july. I will have done 6 months here by then and thats more than enough. i think my brain may slowly turn in to a useless empty grey mass if i stayed here for a long time.
no major plans for the weekend but its supposed to be nice and warm this weekend and its also a public holiday on monday. have to work for a couple of hours tomorrow (saturday) but should be done by lunchtime and will try and get out in the nice warm sunny weather we are forecast.
Today i have mostly been listening to incubus – pardon me
Pardon me, whilst i burst into flames
Have a lovely weekend V. Take care and keep smiling. :-)
its been constant rain and showers all week. its not really nice except when its makes a rainbow.
2 comments:
That was a great story...I was laughing out loud on that one! It is the worst when you have no where to go when something like that happens, you just have to get through it and try to breath through your mouth. That same thing happened to me on a plane one time...imagine a few hours with that smell, and no breaks of fresh air!! ugh
Hope you had a good weekend...my Sunday is just beginning. Im going to finish organizing the babies room, and clean the house. I guess I am in my "nesting" stage, at least that is what my book says. I think I am just bored and can't do anything with this belly except mope around the house.
I am in the midst of writing you a very long e-mail in regard to the past few months, and what happened to my boss and CEO...very juicy stuff. I should be able to finish it today hopefully, but if not I'll e-mail it to my work address and finish it there
ok talk to you soon!!
-V
gossip is always welcome here. send as much as you can. looking forward to it. :-)
its very early in ar when you posted this. i can't be getting up that early on a sunday.
Post a Comment